Starting Over from Scratch: How God Rebuilt Me Before He Restored Me

There are certain moments in life that divide your story into a before and an after. They are the moments you never plan for, never request, and certainly never expect. Yet when you look back years later, you realize those moments became the turning points that shaped who you would become. For me, one of those moments happened when I lost what I considered one of the best jobs of my life.

For ten years, I worked at Monroe Energy. The compensation was excellent, the culture was healthy, and the relationships I built there were meaningful. It was the kind of place where people genuinely enjoyed coming to work. I often joked with friends and colleagues that I would never leave Monroe unless God personally told me to leave. At the time, I thought I was simply expressing how much I appreciated the opportunity. Looking back, I realize God was listening to every word.

The final year before my layoff was unusual. Nothing catastrophic had happened, but I could sense that something was changing. There was a growing awareness that God was trying to get my attention. Around that same time, I began having recurring thoughts about motivational speaking, leadership coaching, and entrepreneurship. The vision for what would eventually become TurningPoint Transitions was beginning to emerge. God was planting ideas in my spirit about helping people navigate change, overcome adversity, and move intentionally through life’s transitions. The problem was not that God was unclear. The problem was that I was comfortable.

Comfort is one of the most misunderstood realities in personal growth. We often assume that because something is good, it must be permanent. We assume that because we are successful, we are necessarily aligned with the next thing God wants to do in our lives. Yet comfort has a way of dulling our sensitivity to change. It can cause us to cling to what is familiar, even when God is preparing something new. I was enjoying the benefits of a stable career, and because I was comfortable, I was not giving adequate attention to the dreams God was placing before me.

When the layoff happened, it felt surreal. I still remember being escorted by security to collect my belongings. I remember walking through the building knowing that a chapter of my life was ending. I remember sitting alone in my car after leaving the gate, staring ahead and trying to process what had just happened. For ten years, I had driven through those gates with confidence about what tomorrow would look like. Suddenly, tomorrow was a question mark.

I discovered that losing a job can sometimes feel like losing a piece of your identity. When you have spent years leading, serving, producing, and contributing, your role can become connected to how you see yourself. When that role disappears, you begin asking deeper questions about your purpose, your future, and your value.

As I sat there, I found myself replaying the statement I had made so many times over the years: “I would never leave this job unless God told me.” In that moment, I realized that perhaps God had spoken more clearly than I wanted to admit. The dreams, the impressions, the recurring ideas about coaching and speaking had all been forms of communication. I simply expected God’s direction to arrive through opportunity rather than disruption. What I learned that day is that God sometimes uses interruption as a form of redirection.

During that season, my faith became an anchor. I did not always understand what God was doing, but I trusted that He was doing something. A small group of faithful friends encouraged me when discouragement threatened to overwhelm me. Their support reminded me that difficult seasons do not have to be faced alone.

The years that followed were among the most challenging of my life. Financial uncertainty created stress. Parenting responsibilities remained. The loss of professional stability forced me to confront questions I had successfully avoided for years. What surprised me most was discovering that unemployment is often less about money than it is about identity. When people lose jobs, they do not simply lose income. They often lose structure, routine, community, affirmation, and a sense of purpose. Psychologists have long recognized that meaningful work contributes significantly to a person’s identity and emotional well-being. When that source of identity is disrupted, people frequently experience grief similar to other significant losses.

Looking back now, I realize God was doing something much greater than helping me find another job. He was rebuilding me.

One of the most important lessons I learned is that many people rush into rebuilding their careers while neglecting to rebuild themselves. We often become so focused on replacing what was lost that we fail to address the deeper issues that transitions expose.

That was certainly true in my experience. I was not merely trying to determine how I would earn a living. I was trying to understand who I was becoming. For years, I had defined myself through roles and responsibilities. I was a manager. I was a leader. I was a provider. I was productive. When those external markers disappeared, I was forced to wrestle with a deeper question: Who is Jermaine when the title is removed?

The answer to that question did not emerge overnight. It required intentional work. During that season, I committed myself to therapy, coaching, spiritual counseling, and personal development. Those investments became some of the most important decisions I have ever made. Therapy helped me uncover childhood experiences and emotional wounds that I had never fully addressed. Like many people, I had learned how to function while carrying unresolved pain. I had become successful without becoming fully healed. Therapy helped me recognize how certain childhood experiences continued to influence my relationships, leadership style, emotional responses, and self-perception.

I reached a point where I knew I could not move into a new season carrying old emotional realities. I did not want to continue functioning from unresolved hurt, disappointment, frustration, depression, or unhealthy patterns. I did not want to build a new future on a damaged foundation. Instead of immediately focusing on launching businesses or creating opportunities, I made a decision to focus on rebuilding Jermaine. That decision changed everything.

One of the most significant insights I gained during that period was understanding that emotional health and spiritual maturity are not the same thing. For years I had faithfully served in ministry and previously pastored for twelve years. I loved God, studied Scripture, and helped others grow in their faith. Yet I discovered that spiritual devotion does not automatically resolve emotional wounds. God cares about our spiritual growth, but He also cares about our emotional well-being. Healing required more than prayer alone. It required honesty, reflection, professional support, and a willingness to confront difficult truths about myself.

The work was not glamorous. There were no awards for healing. There was no applause for self-awareness. There were no public celebrations for counseling sessions or difficult conversations. Yet those years became some of the most productive years of my life. I learned that healing is not separate from success. Healing is preparation for success.

Many people view healing as a pause in progress. I came to understand that healing is progress. Every breakthrough in counseling was progress. Every difficult prayer was a progress. Every unhealthy belief that was challenged was progress. God was strengthening the foundation before expanding the structure.

While therapy helped me understand my past, coaching helped me build my future. Coaching challenged me to stop viewing myself as a victim of circumstances and begin seeing myself as an active participant in my own growth. It pushed me to clarify my vision, establish goals, and take responsibility for creating the future I desired. Research in positive psychology consistently demonstrates that individuals who develop a sense of agency are more resilient during periods of adversity. In other words, people become stronger when they believe they have the capacity to influence their future rather than merely react to it. Coaching helped me cultivate that mindset.

Even today, I continue working with both a therapist and a life coach. One of the greatest blessings of those relationships is that both professionals are grounded in the Christian faith. Their work has reinforced my belief that God often works through people, processes, and professional support systems to accomplish healing and growth. Seeking help is not a sign of weakness. It is an act of wisdom.

As my healing progressed, my vision became clearer. The ideas that God had planted years earlier began taking shape. TurningPoint Transitions was born out of my own experience navigating uncertainty. I realized that countless people find themselves facing career transitions, relationship transitions, leadership transitions, and life transitions without a framework for understanding what is happening. Many see transitions only as endings. I began seeing them as opportunities for reinvention and growth.

At approximately the same time, several friends encouraged me to explore the real estate industry. Their encouragement eventually led me to become a real estate inspector and launch TouchPoint Real Estate Inspections. Looking back, I am amazed by how God used one difficult season to create multiple opportunities that I never would have considered had I remained comfortable. What initially felt like a setback became the catalyst for entrepreneurship, personal growth, and professional reinvention.

Neither opportunity was part of my original plan. Both emerged from a season I initially viewed as a setback. This taught me another valuable lesson. Sometimes God uses painful transitions to introduce possibilities we never would have considered otherwise. Some doors only become visible after previous doors have closed.

Perhaps the most surprising developments came later. Following my separation and divorce, I had largely accepted that remarriage might not be part of my future. Likewise, I had stopped actively pursuing a return to pastoral ministry. My focus had shifted toward healing, coaching, and business development. Then, in a single season, God brought both opportunities back into my life. I married my wonderful wife, Sherica, and became the Senior Pastor of Antioch Baptist Church in Camden, New Jersey.

The timing of my call to Antioch remains one of the clearest reminders that God’s plans often differ from our own. Sherica and I were preparing to move to Georgia in April 2025. Our lease was ending, and we believed the move would create new opportunities for our businesses. The plan made perfect sense. Then Antioch elected me as Senior Pastor in March 2025, one month before our planned relocation. In that moment, Proverbs 16:9 became more than a verse; it became a lived reality. We had planned our way, but God directed our steps.

When I reflect on this entire journey, I do not primarily see a story about losing a job. I see a story about transformation. I see a story about God using disruption to create direction. I see a story about healing, growth, and preparation. Most importantly, I see a story about a God who rebuilds people before He restores opportunities. The businesses, the marriage, and the pastorate are all blessings. Yet the greatest gift was becoming a healthier, wiser, and more self-aware man.

If there is one lesson, I hope readers take from my story, it is this: transitions are not just about what you lose. They are also about what you gain. Sometimes God allows a chapter to close because He wants to develop capacities that could not emerge any other way. Sometimes, the greatest blessing on the other side of a transition is not the opportunity itself. Sometimes the greatest blessing is the person you become while navigating it.